Evans “Buddy” King
In my humble opinion, sleep is vastly overrated, as I write this at 3:30 in the morning.
This hour is an especially appropriate time for me to write about sleep, as I have met 3:30 a.m. both coming and going many times in my life. Sometimes waking early and getting a head start on the day, other times continuing a night of revelry or finishing a project.
So when the clock strikes 3:30 a.m., I may be waking from a poor night’s sleep or about to begin one. The only certainty is that a “solid eight hours” will take between two and two and a half nights.
I said at the outset that I think sleep is overrated. I am sure that all of the studies are accurate, or reasonably so, and that we should all aspire to get more and better sleep; “rem sleep,” or whatever the heck that is.
Sleep is good for you. Early to bed and early to rise is solid dogma. It’s just that the early to bed part just doesn’t happen in my world.
Even as a child, I was always anxious to rise and start the day. My wife loved telling the story that her brother would get angry with his mother when he was a kid when she didn’t get him up early on a Saturday morning.
He would say, “you’re wasting my play time!” It’s not my quote but it could have been.
In my teenage years, most of my contemporaries reveled in their sleep. Noon was the normal waking hour on Saturdays in the absence of a weekend job. Noon! I would normally have been up six hours by then.
I am not saying I necessarily always accomplished a lot during this extra time, but I at least got to enjoy the early morning, which is by far the prettiest part of the day and surpassed in excitement only by late night, of which I have enjoyed my share as well.
I even had a girlfriend of sorts in high school that typically slept till four in the afternoon on Saturdays! She might as well have been in school.
College was by far the most challenging period of my lifelong war on sleep. Many a Saturday and Sunday mornings, I did not feel chipper. In fact, I often felt whatever the opposite of chipper is.
I nonetheless usually pulled myself out of bed and began the day around the time the sun came up, occasionally having seen it start its ascent only moments earlier.
I am one of the proud few who can attest to the beauty and serenity of a college campus on a weekend morning. Charlottesville at 8 on a Sunday morning resembled what Neil Armstrong must have seen when he stepped out onto the surface of the moon.
The beginning of my legal career only enabled (in today’s parlance) my addiction to not sleeping. Our managing partner started each day in the office no later than six.
In setting our holiday calendar, he would announce our official dates as “Christmas and half a day on Easter.” He preferred Saturday night mass so as not to interfere with the Sunday workday.
Naturally, a lot of our young lawyers chose to follow this practice. It was a badge of honor to be seen sitting at your desk at 6:15 a.m. when Herb walked by your door.
Of course, the corollary principle was that you would often get handed a file and told to go to Webster County that morning for a deposition in a case you knew nothing about. Herb was notorious for scheduling multiple matters each day “in case something settled.”
I for one had no problem with being in the office by 6 a.m., at least until my first daughter was born. This blessed event pushed me back to a 7 a.m. arrival time.
When daughter number two came along, the 7 a.m. ETA became 8 a.m. I joked that we couldn’t have a third child, because I wouldn’t be able to make my billable hours.
Here are a couple of apocryphal stories about the notoriety of my sleep issues. Once, when my wife was asked if I snored, she said, “I don’t know, there’s never been a time when was I awake and he was asleep.”
Another time one of my partners wives said, “you don’t sleep well, because your mind is always working.”
If only it was so! I often lay in bed at two in the morning without a thought in my head other than why am I not asleep?
To end, I have to tell one of my favorite war stories about the hours I keep. Not a particularly proud moment, but a funny —and all too true—story.
The moment occurred at one of our firm’s annual conferences. Over the years, the firm conference has been a veritable petri dish for odd goings on, particularly late night ones.
This time I left the after party, which was after the first two after parties that had ended. I went back to my room, my wife having beaten me there by probably a good five hours.
I had actually been crazy enough to agree to a golf game at eight that morning. I called the front desk and asked the night clerk for a wake up call at 7 a.m. She said, and I quote, “why don’t you just stay up?” I asked what did she mean? She responded, it’s 6:45! I said, “make that 7:15,” and laid down.
So if you’re ever up in the middle of the night with nothing to do, email or text me. Pretty good odds I will respond quickly.
Evans “Buddy” King grew up in Christiansburg and graduated from CHS in 1971. He lives in Clarksburg, West Virginia, where he practices law with the firm of Steptoe and Johnson PLLC. He can be reached at Evans.King@steptoe-johnson.com